My Greatest Teachers

I am not sure you could exist in the world right now and not feel the heaviness of circumstance for yourself, your loved ones, or the human collective.  There is no denying that the world is a dumpster fire right now,  as Luvvie  Ajayi Jones, refers to it, and at the same time the most amazing, awe-inspiring mix of love and humanity. It is the exact dichotomy of the human experience at this moment for me and maybe you see it that way as well.  

I have been feeling the heavier "dumpster fire" side of things more strongly in recent days and continuing with mindful practices has been the only way for me to navigate through.  I have also been recalling who and what my greatest teachers have been and looking for any wisdom they could offer to this current reality.

I was thinking of a book I read many years ago called, "All I really need to know I learned in Kindergarten" by Robert Fulghum. I can remember being touched by the simplified list of things we teach children and how you could apply them to your adult life. Years later, when I began to spend the majority of my time with children in my career, it became more clear to me that we are not the ones imparting wisdom to children and teaching them how to navigate the world, but that they are the ones teaching us if we are open to learning.  The list of childhood rules in this book, however heartwarming,  was really a  specific recipe of contrived adult wisdom, and the real teachers were the kindergarteners themselves. 

I have had the privilege of learning from children most of my adult life and right now, they are the exact source that I believe we all need to look to for wisdom in the current circumstances.   Research shows us that explicit memories can form from age two on but that the majority of people's first memories begin at age seven.   This supports my theory of children as our teachers because it means that, before this age, they haven't developed a cognitive self.  This is to say that they don't have a sense of separateness, they are not identifying with beliefs about their abilities, values, or even their physical characteristics. This leaves them open to a full human experience uninhibited by others and the purest form of wisdom and truth that exists.

Over the years, the children in my life have humbled, challenged, inspired, and helped me to grow. It is like having a mirror held to my face and my actions in every moment that says just maybe there is another way of seeing or doing this.  

When we have children of our own we often think that our role as a parent is also to teach, advise, protect and shape our children into adults but what ends up happening is that they are the ones who do this for us.  So here is what I have been thinking the children of the world can teach us right now. 

1. Be here in the present moment. No one does this better than a young child. 

2. Be resilient. Recover as quickly as a child does from difficulties.

3.  Love through challenges. It has always been amazing and heartbreaking how much love a child has for their families when going through the toughest circumstances.

 4. Question. No one asks "Why" more than young children to learn and understand.

5.  Be vulnerable. Who knows better than a child how to say it like it is for them.

6. Have a good cry, because children know it just feels good to release it all.

7.  Forget and move on quickly. What was a big deal ten minutes ago, may have been fixed with a hug or snack.

8. Play and move your body.  Kids instinctively know that this releases just about everything including stuck emotions.

9.  See the wonder around you. It is always there and if you can't see it, get a child to show you.

10. It's all shiny and brand new if we choose to see it that way. This is found in a child's enthusiasm for life.

11.  Look out for your friends.  No one does this more honestly and authentically than a child.

12. Stay open. Remember when your heart was as big as a child's.

 13. Be flexible. Children adapt better than anyone.

14.   Try,  fail,  try again. Have you ever witnessed a young child unwilling to try?

15.  Trust. Children often have no control over their circumstances or their adults but they continue to trust them.

16.  Be willing to look for new ways of seeing and doing things. A young child doesn't have the box we put ourselves and others in.

If you are open to following the wisdom they are offering us you will keep room for joy throughout these times because it is still there. After all, they are still here, the children, our wisest teachers.